Violent relationships can often be complex, and there are many kinds of abuse that can occur in a dating relationship: verbal, emotional, physical, and sexual.
Emotional abuse originates in the aggressor’s desire to control the other person’s behavior.
Reproductive coercion can also come in the form of pressure, guilt and shame from an abusive partner.
Some examples are if your abusive partner is constantly talking about having children or making you feel guilty for not having or wanting children with them — especially if you already have kids with someone else.
It soon progressed to name-calling, insults, unfounded accusations, degradation, humiliation, and isolation.
The first step in domestic violence is to charm the victim; the second is to isolate the victim. I began believing I deserved the abuse, and thought everybody else believed I was who he said I was.
It can be verbal and emotional, in the form of statements that make you feel pressure, guilt, or shame.
You can also be made to feel forced through more subtle actions.
It affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. I never imagined such shame and at 15 years old, understood it even less. It was those incidents that left long-lasting emotional scars. My story begins at the age of 14 and continues off and on until I was 22.The signs weren't obvious, especially to a 14 year-old, but it began with him telling me he didn't like the shirts I wore, or that my skirt was too short; at the time, it was easy to mistake jealousy and control for adoration.For example, an abusive partner: Even if your partner isn’t forcing you to do sexual acts against your will, being made to feel obligated is coercion in itself.Dating someone, being in a relationship, or being married never means that you owe your partner intimacy of any kind.It’s not always easy to tell at the beginning of a relationship if it will become abusive.In fact, many abusive partners may seem absolutely perfect in the early stages of a relationship.The abuser tries to limit a dating partner’s ability to act independently, and undermines their confidence.Verbal abuse can include swearing at a partner, insulting and belittling them, and threatening or terrorizing them with words.Many of these different forms of domestic violence/abuse can be occurring at any one time within the same intimate relationship.Here at The Hotline, we use the Power & Control Wheel* to describe most accurately what occurs in an abusive relationship.