A typical first date might be grabbing a drink, coffee, or even a bite. That's why Fisher recommends third-party activities—think: bowling, a concert, a group happy hour—in lieu of sitting across the table from a near-perfect stranger.Movies (in a theater and not at someone’s apartment), comedy shows, or any of these 29 unique first-date ideas would also work.But it’s generally not a great idea to dive head first into deeply personal disclosures on date numero uno, Fisher says.Spilling too much about your life early on can drive others away, studies suggest.That's not to say you should lie about these things, but try focusing on the upsides and positives in your life before launching into the real-er stuff.Then, assess if you feel you can trust the person before you “go there,” Fisher says, noting that a healthy level of closeness requires time (read: numerous dates) to develop.Choose photos and details that best represent you, Salkin says.Uploading untruths attracts folks who don’t share your true interests and courts difficulty once you have to explain yourself.
Plus, swiping left too many times may cause us to devote more energy to vetting candidates who may be out of our league, connect with people who don’t actually match up with our personal preferences, or issue “no’s” to potentially good matches simply because we assume something better is just a click away.That's why it's best to save opening up about tough issues—from exes to family issues to health problems—until we know a person's ready to hear it.Too much too soon can be off-putting, creating the sense that we're more of a burden than an exciting new prospect, Salkin says.Be honest about what you're looking for, but don't get too "heavy" about it.Think: "Looking for someone who loves old movies / who reads / who's active and enjoys the outdoors." Not: "Looking for someone to spend the rest of my life with, who supports me unconditionally, and loves me for all my flaws." (We all want that, but shoving it in everyone's face right off the bat can feel intimidating, oppressive, and desperate.)“There is nothing less informative than, ‘I am very close to my family and friends’ or ‘I love to go to dinner and hang out with my family and friends,’" Salkin says.Also, express interest in what the other person is saying: "Oh, that's interesting you work in finance. " or "Very cool about your meditation practice—what do you like most about it?" And bring up topics that make you psyched—like your fave TV show, a great book you're reading, or an upcoming trip you can't wait for. D., points out, these set-ups can quickly get awkward, as they’re far more intense than a situation where the focus is on something other than yourselves.And while there are plenty of benefits to being (and staying) solo, we understand the allure of finding that special someone.To help you out, we've rounded up 10 science-backed, expert-approved ways to boost your dating prospects, whether you're dating online or IRL.But these aren’t the only reasons you should listen to what a date’s saying.If you’re tuned out or otherwise disengaged during first encounters and beyond, you’ll derive as little satisfaction as the person you’re ignoring simply by failing to be present in the moment.