Your language is a representation of your mind and heart. Gone are the days of courting and chivalry, which itself is slowly fading into the past, reserved for a pre-technology/Internet period that none of us seem to remember. Dress in a way that projects how you expect to be treated—and that’s good dating advice for men, too. How should Southern girls dress for a typical date—say dinner and a movie? In all areas of life, I believe being a lady displays self-respect, class, appreciation and etiquette. Being a lady starts with how you treat yourself and others. A lady warrants a respectable reputation purely by the consistency of her word. Your time is precious and valuable and you are clearly booked days in advance. He comes and picks you up, especially on the first date. However if you are meeting someone in person for the first time, meeting in a neutral location is a smart, safe move. So set the time you need to be home in advance and let your gentleman know about it ahead of time. Appreciation: Being a lady and acting lady-like does not mean that you are entitled or snobby. The English used the term “go dutch” in “derisive application,” as they stereotyped the Dutch as being cheap, or “stingy.” Today, the gentleman always picks up the tab, especially on the first date, and with no expectations.” 30 Characteristics of a Modern Lady explains that ultimately etiquette is the natural byproduct that flows through a lady’s character.It also allows you to enjoy the niceties of life with the ease of knowing how to act in all situations. She dresses tastefully: A lady dresses appropriately for the occasion. Phone calls: When in doubt, a good rule of thumb is not to make phone calls before 9 am or after 9 pm. She is gracious: She never just says, “hello” when being introduced to someone. She offers her seat to the elderly, disabled or a parent with small children. She RSVPs promptly, reads an invitation thoroughly and does not ask for exceptions. Bringing a small hostess gift shows your appreciation for the preparation your host has done. Someone who honors your time will plan ahead and ask to take you out with at least a 48 hour request. It can be inconvenient, but is it your job to make dating you convenient? Practice having a heart of gratitude and always say thank you for specific actions or generosities. How to order: Have respect for your gentleman and do not behave with entitlement by ordering the most expensive thing on the menu. These traditions are mostly common- sense that simply allow you and others to enjoy life more.If anyone takes the time and effort to make a dinner, they are your host. Today, the gentleman pulls out her seat, and sits facing away from the crowd and the TV because he doesn’t want to be distracted from his priority when he forgets to take his Ritalin. He sits after she sits “…and at the table wait until she is seated, indeed wait until every lady is seated, before taking your own place” 8.
But if he’s in a hurry, he can just pull up in the driveway and honk his horn, right? And he'd better hope Daddy's not home when he tries it. The gentleman opened the door for her so she wouldn’t have to drop her dress in the dirt. He doesn’t LOL for the sake of attention “Frequent and loud laughter is the characteristic of folly and ill-manners…”Letters to His Son on the Art of Becoming a Man of the World and a Gentleman (1746).The modern gentleman helps her in and out of the car to stand in the way of creepy gawkers. He never criticizes a home-made meal An out-loud criticism of a meal as a guest was considered disrespectful to the host. He might write an “LOL” over text in the present, but He commands attention through his strong character. He pulls out her chair It was common for the gentleman to pull out her chair and allow her to face the open room.As we discussed in the last article, there is history behind gentleman etiquette. He stands when she walks in the room In the old days, men stood out of respect when a lady, dignitary, or elderly person walked in the room. Today, men stand out of courtesy when a guest visits a meeting.A gentleman will stand from his table when he’s introduced to a guest. He walks by her on the outside, closest to the street Why is the top coat symbolic of the gentleman?We are in the post-modern dating era, where it’s socially acceptable, albeit rude, to not break up with someone in person, and also where it is quite feasible to maintain a relationship by texting what you feel. Enter: angry emoji’s and cowardly arguments via text.Dating has changed drastically even during the past ten years, leaving us without proper dating etiquette. Does he insist that you see a matinee to save money?Acting like a lady is carrying yourself with dignity, which also empowers a man to be a gentleman. If you are going out with a gentleman, he will cover your date.Chivalry IS, in fact, dead when men no longer understand the meaning behind a chivalrous action.When actions no longer come from within, but are forced and expected, the inner gentleman dies and so does chivalry.